Being successful: How to Re-Motivate When You’ve Had a Set Back

Hopeless Hannah

You want to be successful. But you’ve had a bad week. Here’s how to re-motivate yourself.

You’ve done it. You’ve taken the leap. Whether it’s quitting your job for pastures new, starting your own business, starting a family or going travelling, there’s now no return.

But you’ve had a pretty crappy week – that bit of business you were counting on has bailed, that blog post you thought would go viral has only has 25 views and you’re starting to worry. You can’t help feeling that nagging sensation inside saying, “you can’t do this, and you can’t turn back. You are such a bloomin’ wally.”

I’ve felt this hump a few times since I’ve taken my own “leap of faith” and here’s how I combatted those nagging voices.

  1. Remove the fear element.

When you’ve finished watching a scary movie, do you feel like you need a lie-down? That’s because fear is completely…

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Sovereign: Beyond the Book

I wholeheartedly recommend you this young writer, whose novels U read breathlessly!

Everything Falls Apart

So far, here at Things Fall Apart, we’ve discussed writing conventions, we’ve covered publishing, we’ve reblogged interviews with our lead author, and we’ve touched on the purpose of Shalamar itself.

This post is for Shalamar’s first major release, Sovereign, and why you will want to have a hand in its journey from final draft to store shelves.

First, you’ll want to know what the novel is about. Sovereign, written by Deborah Dixon, centers on a war between Hell and Heaven, in which a fallen angel named Jael is playing both sides. Intrigue and adventure abound, and Jael finds herself thoroughly enjoying the game – but she soon discovers that the more involved she gets, the more danger she’s in; and she realizes that the war is not at all what it seems to be.

Of course, in true Shalamar fashion, the novel does more than simply tell a…

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I admit I am confronted with an activity problem on my nearly six years old site. Most of the sites have one, at a moment or another.

I feel it is something wrong with the very slow pace we have progressed with this year, and with people posting, instead of each week, only 1-2 times a month. In one year of writing, we have covered only two story months. In other years, there were three to six story months for a year of writing. If a quicker pace was possible before, and it created more enthusiasm for “the next episode” of the story, why it isn’t possible now anymore?

I think some people lose interest because the writing partners take too long to post. But they are saying that reminding them they owe posts is stressful and this makes them lose interest. I can’t understand this. Because it is only raising awareness that their contribution is needed, important, awaited, and their absence is blocking stories.

Being needed is a nice feeling, and it should be one more motivating reason to find inspiration and time. smile.gif (This is exactly why I am always writing more for others than alone; because I know that other people are waiting for the “next round”). I am thinking ”My posts are needed, people are waiting for me, so I’ll make time as soon as I can”. (Which may mean instead of watching a movie or of doing something else which is for free time).

I am trying my best to stimulate people to write and be inspired, with everything I can, but it seems I am the only one doing it – and sometimes it feels damn lonely on my own site. This is when I get pessimistic and I think that nobody else cares about it, while I am giving all my best to the story and the community. It feels as one-sided as I am losing inspiration for stories I loved writing.

When I am sad, bored or tired of numbers or of drama in real world, I am starting to write, in order to get immersed in a different world. And I keep writing. But if one person not posting, doesn’t lead to inactivity and site dying, when most persons on a small site aren’t posting, the 2-3 who do… can they really make a significant difference, no matter how often they post? Because it is just a little part of the plots, and usually not the important ones, which get forward, and the others get waiting and waiting.

I think this is my main problem, especially that I know this site used NOT to be like this. The community was bubbly, involved, there were people of all speeds, and the stories were written quicker… Now, they are disenfranchising from us by simply not posting and not being anymore part of our WRITING community. sad.gif Being active means being connected to the community. If they don’t understand this, what can I do? I can’t explain it any better to make them understand.

If we, each of us, no longer feel like putting in the effort, then we have made the conscious decision to let our site die. I am always willing to make this effort, but I can’t do it alone. And, unfortunately, not recognizing that we have an activity problem means not seeking consciously solutions, both within ourselves and all together.

The inactivity is the problem, at the whole board level. And instead of being stimulated to be more active when others aren’t, each one is complacent that “the others haven’t posted either, I can procrastinate as well.” Some do not even acknowledge it is a problem for the site, in order to seek solutions – both inside them and together with the others.

When we can’t get more writers (because, let’s admit, older sites seem to be less attractive for newcomers, despite the reassurance that they are more established and less prone to disappear in a whim), the solution to keep going on is to be more active ourselves – and it is a collective endeavour. A person alone can’t bring the needed activity, when the story is collective, needing various crews.

I have seen this elsewhere in the past. Sites once busy, then one left, another stopped posting, if those two weren’t anymore, others stopped posting too, either waiting for the others’ posts, or just because – and in 2 months the site was a ghost town. And it is something which would naturally lead to the death of the site, if nobody stops it somehow. But how to stop it? What more can I do in order to make the plot running smoother, better?

I really am trying my best. And maybe from here a big part of the lonely feeling… Don Quijote fighting windmills, misunderstood by the people around, who claim it is normal and we have no problem? I do care about our writing community together, writing, because this is what gathered us together. I can’t do everything in this world, but I am doing as much as I can, and I am searching for what else to do in order to keep the community together, to keep the story going. And nobody else admits that inactivity might be a problem.

I understand people being busy for a while and people having lost interest (in writing in general or in this story in special). It doesn’t mean I am not regretting their good characters, their writing style, their warm presence and their interesting ideas. I do. But I know I can’t fight something which belongs inside each person. If they don’t have motivation from inside, to write, I can’t give it to them with any outside intervention. sad.gif And, in exchange, I start losing mine if my writing partners don’t care about the story anymore, because I feel I am doing everything in vain, for no readers and no writing partners.

You say that by not doing anything about it, there will be less stress and it will be better. I beg to differ, but I accept making the experiment because there is nothing I can do, more than what I am already doing. It might be the beginning of the end for the site. Hopefully not happening, but even if it does, I’d say like in the Bible – the blood of the dying site will be on your hands, not on mine.



Numai cei mai în vârstă îşi amintesc, poate, de farmecul inegalabil al petecului de pământ terasat şi de arşiţa soarelui, de trandafiri, gutui, leandri uriaşi, smochini şi viţă-de-vie, situat pe Dunăre, la circa trei kilometri în aval de Orşova.


  Dunarea la Cazane

Dunarea la Cazane .. Remember II - insula scufundata Ada Kaleh., Romania



 Ostrovul, care a cunoscut alternanţa vremurilor de război şi de pace, a fost rebotezat de ocupanţii turci, în 1788, Ada Kaleh, ceea ce se traduce drept „Fortăreaţa Insulei” sau „Cetatea Insulei”.

În 1971, turnul minaretului geamiei, locul de rugăciune a celor aproximativ 1000 de musulmani vorbitori de română, a căzut spulberat de dinamită, pentru a face loc apelor supraînălţate din cauza construirii barajului Hidrocentralei Porţile de Fier, vedeta, un covor imens cu motive orientale (15×9 m) şi o greutate de 480 kg, dar al sultanului Abdul Hamid al II-lea (1876-1909), umplându-se de praf.

A căzut sub privirile uimite ale bătrânelor care încă mai purtau feregea…

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Fostering The Inner Child & The Importance Of Playtime



If you were born prior to the year 2000 chances are you had a playful childhood. After the new millennium, things took a bit of a turn and there’s a whole new generation of youth that has spent their early years staring at a screen or connected to a virtual world. Either way, we all grow up. And one of the casualties of growing up often seems to be the inner child. After all, adulthood is associated with responsibility, caring for others, developing careers, networking, acquisitions, important decisions, serious paperwork, tight schedules, daily stress and so on…

So what happens to the inner child once we reach the adult stage? Does it just fade away? Does it get buried under paperwork? Or is it that we simply no longer have time to foster it?

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