Yes, I do, every time I read certain posts on a resource site – be it this one or another. As if I am the oddest being among the others…. who think in a hivemind. And I am still trying in vain to find a writing buddy to match my way of seeing things. It is impossible to be the only one, since my opinions weren’t created in a void, but after reading enough creative writing articles from various writers.
It is impossible to not find somebody who is also story-oriented, who loves discussing plots and characters alike, who sees challenging himself not as stressful, but as the natural way to evolve as a writer, somebody who isn;t flimsy, but dedicated to finish a story once started… They should be somewhere in the mist, but how can I meet them and let the mist courtain fall?
Is everybody saying “just a hobby” as if a hobby shouldn’t involve the desire to evolve, to improve, to meet the same standards and rules of creative writing and to integrate in a collectivity, be it a virtual one? (And of courtesy too, since we are not writing alone, but with others, so we should be more accomodating and less selfish).
Also, for me, challenging myself is not stressful, but inspiring, mobilizing me to achieve something. I need challenges to overcome. It just means a goal more to strive for, ie an achievement more after a while. The satisfaction of having overcome a challenge and to have learnt something new.
(Exactly how some people have found that having a deadline is stressful and determines procrastination. By contrary, for me setting myself deadlines if nobody else does gives me structure and direction. If I know x thing has to be ready in x days, I know how to plan to make it possible and I avoid procrastination, while if it should be ready “whenever you have time”, it is too vague and I might procrastinate to never make time for it…)
I am setting myself goal after goal, challenge after challenge to overcome. I think, for the analogy with video games (which I don’t play) it is… unlocking a next level. This comes with the satisfaction of having won – but having won against a computer is nothing vs. having won against yourself. The satisfaction is much more. If I like something, I do it with pleasure and I strive to be better at it. Researching and learning more about creative writing, practicing, experimenting and challenging myself are part of the fun of having writing as my main hobby.
The fact that I like writing and I like immersing myself in other centuries and countries, with their adventures, doesn’t necessary mean that I want to escape my life and this is why I am writing. I like returning to my regular life, even if it has a different kind of challenges (which I don’t necessary like, because I don’t like everything I have to do in my daily life). I am writing because I can’t live without writing. And I like to have the readers immersed in the environment and adventures I am describing.
Still… there aren’t any people like me, and everybody looks at me as if I am the oddest being, totally different from them. Really, am I? Have the others like me just vanished, and only published writers, famous in their circles, have remained to share these opinions and characteristics?